Fatass Riley in Surry Hills

[j-lover]

Private ads on cracker should be taken with a mountain of salt: Punters who are not into fat chicks, you can stop reading here. Went to investigate this ad today:

http://cracker.com.au/classifieds/sydne ... 32685.aspx

and she has more pics here:

http://cracker.com.au/classifieds/sydne ... 20881.aspx

Some chick called Riley (0431 445 867), who operates out of a flat in Surry Hills. The flat itself is very clean and tidy. It feels like someone’s private home.

I was greeted by an obese chick in her twenties. She had a pretty face, but that was her sole redeeming feature. As you can see from the above ads, I was expecting a hot young chick with a sexy body. Hangdog, if you’re still reading, you’ll be disappointed in me. I didn’t have the guts to turn around and walk back out. Instead, I handed her the $250 and proceeded with shower, followed by very poor massage technique. Then the dosy cow gets oil on my cock, which is not a good idea if you’re about to put on a rubber. So I had to go and wash that oil off first

She couldn’t figure out why I was “so quiet”, but seriously, I’m not gonna chat up a fatso. Because she was so fat, I had trouble getting it up, and I came as quickly as I could and fucked off out of there 20 mins early.

I suppose it’s really my fault – the devil is in the detail of the ad. If you look carefully, you’ll see she’s specified her height as 5’6” (167cm,), yet her dress size is 10. Normally a dress size of 10 implies the girl is quite tall (about 180 cm), ie better proportioned. Thinking about it, the only way anyone can be size 10, yet only 5’6” is if they’re obese.

Recommended? Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!! Holy cow, no. Not unless you’re seriously into obese chicks. If she were to lose a huge amount of weight, she would actually be quite hot, cuz she has a pretty face.

Looks 5/10
Body 1/10
Sex 2/10
Attitude 8/10
Overall 2/10

Why are these cracker privates such duds?

[j-lover]

To give you a better idea, here is a picture which is much more representative of what she truly looks like. While not quite as fat as this, this is far closer to the truth than those fakearse pics she posted in her ads (you will need scroll to the myspace profile at the bottom).

Warning, do not view this picture if you are eating or about to eat:

http://blog.jimmyr.com/Best_motivationa ... 8_2008.php

Enjoy

[Hangdog3]

Mate!! I expected you of all people would be off like a Bondi tram when confronted with such serious danger! But I have to confess, sometimes I have a strange yearning for a tubby one to have a bit of a bounce on. Then I come to my senses... Give Lucy a shot. I'll do a review now.

[boronia]

If you like them big, take a look at this:
http://www.youporn.com/watch/155121

[j-lover]

If you like them big, take a look at this:
http://www.youporn.com/watch/155121

Holy crap that fellow is off his fuckin trolley to contemplate that

I was so grossed out, I gave up watching after 10 secs.

[Hangdog3]

I lasted a bit longer, but now I feel ill!.....

[trypod]

Just say NO!!!
Set your phone up to ring and say your house is on fire, I gotta go!!

[j-lover]

They won't buy that, they've heard it all before. Assuming I'm in that situation again (and I can be brave enough), I'd rather just tell 'em straight out that the girl in the pix is not the girl I'm being offered, aka switch 'n' bait.

[Hangdog3]

Ive buggered off loads of times j-lover - almost always because the description given didnt match the reality. Once when I was young and green I went to see a "21 year old blonde penthouse model". Followed a plain black haired chick with a nose ring up three flights of stairs to a bedroom and she turns around and gives me the price. I said, "wheres the blonde girl?". She says, "I am the only girl here (not "only girl available here" - and Id just walked right through the apartment so I knew the girl on the phone was the only other one there). So I just turned around and marched out, saying to the receptionist "you said she was a blonde penthouse model" and that was it.... first time Id walked out. And they cant do a thing about it, so whats the problem? Theyre not gonna stalk you or anything or ring you up on the number you used bcos theyre way too busy to bother and they get millions of calls all the time.

Its your dough and if you dont want to buy, dont... All it will cost you is a bit of your time and a few seconds of discomfort - and generally the wl is more uncomfortable than you if you walk. She doesnt want to cause a scene...

You dont have to give a reason. Just say "nah, sorry, Ive changed my mind about this". They'll assume youve suddenly turned gay or something, but who cares? Its not like youre going to be sharing a house with em for the rest of your life... If you want a bit of fun, tell em your doctor told you not to have sex until the scabs have healed and you think ones bleeding. They'll help you leave...

[Shyboy]

Hey Hangdog, what about an outcall WL? If the WL turns up at your door is not the one you're looking for or is not the one as they described, what will you do? Do you tell her no, and send her back? What if she doesn't want to go and causes a scene outside your home or hotel room?

Would like to hear your opinion. Thanks.

[Hangdog3]

Hey Hangdog, what about an outcall WL? If the WL turns up at your door is not the one you're looking for or is not the one as they described, what will you do? Do you tell her no, and send her back? What if she doesn't want to go and causes a scene outside your home or hotel room?

Would like to hear your opinion. Thanks.

Same deal dude - just make sure you get her inside and then explain the situation. Usually I get her inside then call the shop and hassle them - after all its their fuck up. Usually, they get annoyed and say okay, okay send the lady back but youve got to pay the taxi/driver cost (usually $20). Thats fair enough for a hassle free departure - after all do you really want to spend another 200 or so on a chick you didnt want.

Once I had 2 chicks turn up and Id been told oneof them did bbbj. Anyway it turned out she didnt, but her english was crap. Id already given my dough to the other girl and wanted her to stay (cos she was cute and did greek) but her english was so bad that I couldnt seem to get through to them that I wanted one to go and the other to stay. In the end I stood in front of my door and said "give me my money" and she did. Then we called the shop and I chucked them out after giving the receptionist a serve.

So - call the shop and cancel. Pay the "cancellation fee" and its all sweet. If youre a good customer they treat you a bit better next time. If they dont, forget that shop...but remember, you should never have to be rude to the wl involved (unless she causes a problem, in which case you might have to be a bit stern and pretend to be really pissed off).

Privates are the same deal but the "cancellation fee" tends to be a little higher as a general rule.

[JS]

Hi,

I think it sucks if she has lied about her size to that degree. That's just not good. I have to admit, that the lady in those photographs doesn't look like a size 10, she looks more a size 12 to 14 but she's posed in a way that it doesn't really show as much.

J-Lover, I do have to dissagree with you on sizes though. I think you're tottally wrong when you say size 10 + 5"6 = fat.

J-Lover, when I was 63kg, I was a size 10. I'm also 5/6. 5/6 = 167-169CM in height. For my height, 58kg is my base weight. If I go under 58kg I would be considered medically anorexic. So my ideal weight is between 58 and 64kg.

[aznonazn]

she doesnt look fat on the pics in the website